Yearly Archives: 2010

monday night – Solstice

Today is the loingest day of the year…. the first official day of Summer.    our ancestors celebrated this day with wild orgys ,  and ritual sacrifices, I settled for several conference calls and a nice salad for lunch.. Truth be told, the day did feel a little longer.. but that might have been the conference calls.    I didn’t even run naked through any woods (though I may go skinny dipping later 🙂

The solstice is one of the very few holidays that man has not created or shaped. It’s an astronomical reality.. whose precise moment may be measured to microseconds.. No popes or state legislatures have ever  messed with the dates, It’s a wodmderfu thing to realize that our ealrliest ancestors had an inling of the improtance of this day.. long before hallmark created a card for it..

For me it  really first day of summer .. after the emotional weight of the last few weeks it feels wonderful to sit here and not have anythign to do (except work)..

I wish you all a lazy summer.. that’s what i’m going for.

As my Wiccan friends say on this date  

Blessed be folks.. Blessed be Sam
-jc

Sunday night – fathers day

Happy fathers day all you dads out there. It’s a funny day.. not one that I every took too much to heart either before or since Sam’s passing. I feel loved and appreciated by my family every day..still.. it’s nce to take the time to mark the dad0 thing..

The thing about today that’s most noteworthy to me is that it marks the end of a cluster of important events…..  all of them imprtant.. soe of the wonderful, others bitter sweet that clustered at this part of the year. Some were entirely positive.. like Max’s birthaday and Gabe’s birthday. his 8th grade graduation and his earning his drivers permit.. others of them were mixed/ bittersweet like marking Sam’s 18th birthday his classes high school graduation   and.. of course Faters day.

we’ve survived.. and thrrived with the help of all the love and supprt we’ve gotten from freinds and family.. and for that.. we thank you all..

This weekend was a good, long close to this eventful couple of weeks. We started in Fort Ann NY . Gabe Diane and I had spent the night therefor Gabes’ All star LAX team tournament.. It was a great event.. great kids, great parents.. ice venue and some really great playing.. I love watching gabe and his new teammates out there..

Gabe gave me a fathers day gift today.. a box of mints that taste like Ranch Dressing wwhich hcih he found in an aptly named ‘Gag Shop’ in Lake George last night.

After Gabes last game.. Diane and Gabe went home with Marcello and Rob.. while I headed East. I wanted to see my Dad on father Day..

I’d originally thought that I was actually closer to my folks house.. but there ar no really good east/west routes there. We settled on meeting them half way I drove 3 hours to Concord NH.. they drove up from Sherborn Ma. to meet me there. We met in a great little Mexican place we found at random on a map. It was  agreat choice. 

We had a great 2 and a half hour lunch and walk there. It was really, really great seeign them.. and gettign to hug my dad on Fathers Day..

My Dad is a wonderful guy.. he’s warm and funny.. and has so much integrrity.. he’s a real mensch. I love him.. I love my folks.. 

I hope you all were able to connect with your dads  and your kids.  either in person, by phone.. or in spirit if that’s the best way you can..

Thanks again to all the folks who’ve reached out to us these past 2 weeks.. It’s helped

nite all.. nite sam.. glad to be your  and your brothers’ dad..

-jc

Saturday evening – The gap

Today was to have been Sam’s high school graduation. An exeact moment in time that I could imagine from the time he was born.. until the day he died.. and every day since. Few things are as fixed in time and location as this.. Birthdays , Holidays.. all happen like clockwork.. but are harder to picture and move around in space. This was a moment that I could picture.. but not like this.

Diane and I got there a little early and found some time to talk to friends. We picked up a program and were surprised and grateful to see Sam’s name in there.. Listed in memoriam . 

It’s real…. unbelievably real.

We were well supported.. many hugs and sad smiles all around.. The principal Jen made a point of finding us as we came in..

I was surprised how I felt in that room. I was uplifted and excited..and.. … actually happy.. So many of our friends, sams friends were graduating today.. These kids have been part of our lives for years.. and if anythign more so since sam’s passing. We love so many of them.. It felt good to be there for them.

We were surrounded by freinds in the bleachers.. as we all fanned to try and keep cool in

The grads-to-be all filed in.. and we tried to pick them out.. Here’s Nate wearing a sash of his own design

Here’s Pat with his Sam tribute on his head

It was great seeing all of our friends get up to speak, sing.. and receive awards..   Here’s Owen giving the validictorian thingy..

And Kevin doing the charge to the students.. he did a clever thing… read txt messages from the class..

Then Avery and friends did some singing.. 

.. then Owen, Jacob, Ben and freinds did ..;Forever Young’.. a song I always associate with someone dieing young. I lost it at this point.. and about 4 folks around me put their armsa around me.. not even sure who they alll were.

Caught sitght of Owen down taking photos..

As his brother Owne and Herron got some sort of award..

Then the grads started their prossesion as each in turn received their diplomas.. here’s our friend Joe..

.and Alex..

The  A’s.. then the B’s.. then.. the C’s..   And then.. there was a gap..

They read Sam’s name.. and paused.. THe place erupted in clapoing and yells.. It was  moving and sad.. and wonderful.. I yelled Sam’s name..

then…

Along came the D’s.. E’s.. .. eventaully the K’s.. here’s Nate.

.. and Justin

Jake..

And Brad wearing the magic tiedye gown that soemone from MMU always gets to wear.

Owen..   I couldn’t get pictures of everyone.. the camera wouldn’t cooperate.. but.. it was wonderful seeing them all

And then.. they were done.. launched out into the world.. It was a great feeling  !.

Max and I both dropped SamStones under our seats.. and we ran for the door.. We had to be in NY for Gab’e s Lacrosse tournement by 1-ish..

Max headed how with Jack.. while Gab,e Diane and I headed South to Fort Ann.  NY.. we made it in great time.. We got there in time for the 2nd half of Gabes game.. It was  a prefect example of how the world keeps moving..

We were now all about Gabe.. and his game..

Ahh.. one veyr cool thing happened at the lacrosse field.. someone had turned in my wallet !!!! ..complete wiht cash.. Thanks oyu kind person.. thank you world. !

After the 2 games we all headed to Lake George Village for dinner..


.. there were even fireworks !!!

and finnally a creamie to fill out a long and emotionally packed day..

We just got back to our hotel room.. Gabe just said.. he was so tired it hurt’.. Same for me..

Thanks for all the love and support we’r gettign from freinds and family these last few weeks it really helps..

night everyone.. nite sam.. and .. congratulations…   we’r every. very proud of you.
-me

Thursday night – Happy birthday Max !

Happy 22nd birthday Max !. I’m so happy that Max decided to come up to Vermont for his birthday.   He is such a great man-kid.  I just love talking with him. He has one of the most creative and active minds of anyone I’ve ever met. and he’s such a warm and loving guy.. (see proof below) ..A bunch of his friends came by the house around 5.. and many are still here at 12:30 as I write.. It’s nice to have the noise and music in the house.

Max and friends fired up the pizza oven that Max and Diane built and they grilled and cooked pizza for everybody.

Around 7 Diane and I took off for MMU to see the Senior ‘Superlative’ night.. You know, the event where they name ‘most likely to succeed’, ‘most popular’. etc..

It was a really cute event.. a couple of our friends got recognized

for stuff.. Nate and Caroline for best musicians, owen for must likely

to succeed, kevin ands most spirit, morgan as half of a ‘twin’ look alike .. Ryan for best

snowboard bum (and then he back flipped off the stage and stuck it

perfectly !), etc..

Near the end, they announced the award for the ‘best smile’ They gave it to Sam !  The whole place stood up as we went down to get the award. It was so sweet.. and so sad.

Friend Caitlyn made a great slideshow that hilighted the whole class.. The closing slides were pictures of Sam  . It means very much to us that the whole place keeps sam in their hearts like they do.. it means so, so much ..

From that bitter sweet.. (more sweet I have to say) event, we drove back to the mild mayhem of a cohn mariano party brewing at the house. lout music yummy food, lots of music and of course fire

Gabe had made it home while we were up at MMU.. so we gave them both their college savings pplans.. a lottery ticket each.. in the hopes that they could actually afford to finish college.

Later in the evening, we served the vegan anatomically shaped (don’t ask) cake that Jack had made for Max.. And we all ang a particularly wonderfully atonal version of happy birthday

We eneded our day with a tequilla toast as my father always does with me..

Happy birthday Max.. you are fine , fine man.. I love you so much and I’m so glad you’re my kid.

Time for sleep.. nite all. Nite Sam !
-me