THoguhtful day today. I had a bunch of meetings woth folks in burlingotn. I took advantage of the good weather and coaxed all of the folks I had to meet with to take our mmeting outside for a walk. I managed to get 3  in that way. I also had lucnh wiht my friend Kerry. I was tellign him babout some of the fun and soem of the struggles I’ve had in coming back from the TV show experience. He said .. “don’t worry, it’s all good”.. I hear that expression often.. ‘it’s all good”.. but never really though of it. He’s right.. the things I’m struggling with … eg. the need to stay present, the need to stay happy at work.. the need towork more with my hands.. are all good choices I’m gooing to make.. It’s a good thing.. not a challenge.. Kerry’s comment gave me a simple but powerful reframing of my situation.. Thanks for that friend…

The day passed quickly and pretty productivly. after work I met Diane, Gabe, and Kristin in Essex to share a ride up to Gabes Lacrosse game in Westford. It was a beutiful drive on a beutifull day, We sat up on a hill to wathc the game it was so beutifull (even if I was too far away to recognize the players’ numbers)

I ran into my freind Mike out on the fireld.and enjoyed catching up with him.  Mike’s  dog lola (right) and the coaches dog Tiki decided that I was a dog person.

After the game (near 8PM).. I made the 40 mile drive down to Monkton to see Homer. We have tomake progress on the drive motors for the Burnign Man vehicle. I got to Homers about 8:40.. He had ‘H G Wells’… his intials.. in 4 foot letters in his front yard.. that was new..

We spent several hours looking at the 1/4 scale model of the feerris wheel car.. and checking out the motors and speed controlers for the full size device.  
Here’s Homer trying to check the speed on one of the motors He dug the motors out of old forklifts.

Homerhas three of the fdorklift motors and each has an old style switching speed controller. the good news is that I know these exact speed controllers form my time on the colony.. the bad news.is .. I wasn’t able to get them to work there.. I’ve brought one of them home to see if I can trick the controller inot working for us. If I can get it workign, we’ll be all set for our drive components. … the devicce will be able to  go forward. backward and turn on its own radius .. I plan to make it so you drive the thing with a Wiimote.. sound interesting ?

I’mjust gettign home now and it’s about 1:15.. time for me to sleep. I camein to find this cool sign that soemone made for the half pipe. I can’t wait to find out who did this.. It looks awesome !
  Thanks whoevr did that !

OKI’m getting so sleepy.. I’ll say gnite.. Gnite everyone.. Gnite Sam !
-me

Another day back closer to treality.. somehow it didnt’ feel s strange as the last couple. I was telling Diane last night that one of the ways that I knew I was getting back ‘in to the world’ is that I noticed that voice in my head.. You know, that constant dialog in your head that analyzes everything you do in life. Some Zen practioners call it the ‘monkey mind’ .. I hadn’t really noticed it until yesterday, but that coice had completely vvanished while I was working on ‘The Colony’. Normally the only thing that shuts it down is my meditation practice. I now realize that the whole Colony thing was like a moving meditation..Even though it was grueling and crazy,  it brought me to the same peaceful and timeless place that meditation does.. strange…   My hope is to keep the voice in check.. one way or the other.   I’m determined to hang on to the sanity that I picked up at the Colony.

I continue to talk to my frineds from the cColony expereince nearly every day. I miss them all. It seems that many of them had hard things come up with their family and reinds while we were off-line. I can’t really go into details  here becase we’re not allowed to talk about the show.  I do want to say to them that my thoughts and heart are with them all..

Work is starting to settle down a bit. I still feel like an outsider there . I’m trying to reclaim some old habits there, too. I began by taking my ‘path less taken’ through the parking lot. I always like to walk the tunnell in the middle of a line of parked cars. It’s like my secret road…

The day passed smoothly enough. I am spending most of my time trying to get my head around a new set of porblems and find a way to be useful quickly. It’s harder than it should be for me. My skills feel rusty.. my instincts seem a little dulled.  think I’m still floating a little from the Colony expereince. I feel my focus returning.. at leas I hope I do : -) 

After work I went down town to have dinner with a bunch of work friends that are visiting from New York..   I spotted this great bumper sticker  and grafitto on the way

Dinner was great.. there were many freinds there.. two very old freinds were there.. Chandu V. and Peter F. both freinds from Grad school 20 years ago (wow .. is that possible ?).. Diane caem in to meet us after dinner. It was so wonderful catching up !

Hear we are wearing clay goat heads from our bear bottles.. stylish.. no ?

Well that was the day.. Ahh Diane and Gabe managed to get the last coat of urethane on the skate ramp.. I think it will be ready to ride tomorrow. It’s been really fun to build .. Here’s a picture from yesterday after Gabe, Kristin and I finsished moutning the top layer of Masonite.

It’s been great working with Gabe on the rnap project.. I hope he really enjoyss using it.Looks good, doesn’t it  Sam. ? . Gnite !
-me

It’s abotu 10:30 on monday night.. and I’m having trouble staying awake. I have a meeting in downtown burlington at 7 am-ish.. and I made the mistake of lying down in bed to blog.   Big, big mistake.. I keep falling asleep.. I fell asleep 3 times trying to help Gabe with his geometry and french homework. Bad dad !
    Not much to report today anyway. I felt like this was the first ‘normal’ day since I returned form the Colony. I say normal becaue it was a Monday on a full week with no travel or other special stuff happening. It felt a little strange to be so back in the world. I made an effort to not get too swept up in the normal workday.. but by mid afternoon I found myself tangled in the normal days quicksand of meetings and powerpoint. I have to tell you that I was fantasizing about flamethhrowers and drill presses by mid afternoond. Maybe I’m just not cut out for corporate life anymore..
    Man..I’m realllly struggling to stay wake.. I think I’m goign to give up and see hwat I can dream about. Hope that’s OK with all of you.. OK folks… more tomorrow. Gnite all.. Gnite Sam
-me

Happy mothers’ day everyone. Hope yours was as nice as ours. As you all can appreciate days like today are bittersweet for us.. but the dominant emotion for the day was really good. My folks were up so we had a joint mothers day breakfast for Diane and my mom. Hey… Diane had to cook it.. I must have been slacking off.. in fact I slept until 9 am which is the latest I frmember sleepign in years !  We had crepes with rhubabrb and strawberrys from last years garden.. and berries . Yum !.

We visitied with my folks for a while then they headed back down to Boston. It was really nice spending time with them..

THe rest of the day was a sleepy blur.. We spent sometime outside  gardening .. but it was only 41 degrees.. not the best summer weather.. we did manage to weed and mulch most of the front flower beds… 

One nice feature of the day is that we had a steady stream of kids drop by to wish Diane a happy mom’s day.. starting last night with Abbott and lindsey, then tn jack, will, and austin .. then today nate, rusty, tyler and a suprise visit from Chris and Amanda.. It was great seeign them all.. these kids really ‘get it’ .. and realize the extra love means so much to us.  

Chris showed us the new ink he’s gotten including a tribute tat for Sam and Chris’s grandfather..

We also had a great call with Max today. Sam was also very much on our minds..I felt him so strongly near us today.  Last night I was standing in the old lab under a mechanical snake that Sam and I had once built.. One of it’s scales dropped onto my hand. I took it as a reminder to pass on love from Sam to Diane today as well.

Well.. I hope you’ve all sent passed on some love to the mothers in your life.. where ever they are.. wherever they live.. in this world or not..  Happy motehr’s day everyone.. happy mothers day, Sam..
-me