The whole house was a awake by 7 this morning for the first time since last June. Today was Gabe’s first day of 6th grade and we wanted to give him a good send off. I’d only been asleep for abotu 3.5 hours… but I dragged myself downstairs just after Gabe slithered down. Diane was wide awake and making waffles ! It was nice all beign together in the morning like that. It was also very different with just the 3 of us. We aer determined to make it as ‘ok’ as we can…That’s our main purpose in life right now
Note Diane’s wearing a down vest !
Gabe packed his stuff into Sam’s old High Cascade backpack, hugged Diane and off we went.
It felt kinda good being up that early (7:30).. It always surprising me that so many people are moving around at that time of the day. There were huge lines to get into the school parking lot since everyone wanted to escort their darlings to their desks.. No such treatment for Gabe.. I dumped him at the curb and sped off…. He actully seemed to be looking forward to the start of classes.
Mr. Rainey was out their Bagpiping as always on the first day ack.. it’s a nice tradition !
I went home and started to meditate.. Next thing I knew it was 10 AM . I dragged myself out of bed and started working. I had planned on taking the week off.. but after shifting my vacation to start last Thursday, I figured I should try to get 2 days of work in this week. My mailbox was crammed from being off the last four days.. so I spent my day digging through my mail and calling in to meetings . I tell you. though… it’s been very tough the last few weeks. My ability to concentrate on work is near zero at this point. It’s a surprise to me.. even though it probably shouldn’t be… that I seem to be stalling so badly now after working back to a fair level of effectivness over the summer. That lead me to an expectation of continuing to slowly build back… I keep learning that there are problems with any expectations. My main refuge now is staying rigourously in the present.. not worrying about the future or the past.. just like I had to do in the few months after Sam’s passing. The present is a nice place actually.. few worries or fears, lots going on.. and everythign that happens to you feels like a surprise.. Unfortunately it’s not that conducive to getting things done, driving strategies, makign a living, etc. I think I’m just going to have to cut back a little between now and November to keep sane….
As Punchy as I was, I did manage to make it throught the day.. I got home and hung out a while with Diane and Gabe.. Around 7:30 Bert, Angus, Chris, and Max E. came over to show us the Snowboard movie they’ve made and deadicated to Sam. It’s called ‘The ToGnar Project’ .. as in ‘totally gnarly’.. It’s really excellent.. great shooting, great editing, excellent music and trick skiing and boarding. There are lots of good ‘outtakes’ mixed in with it too.
Our pondskiminng on the raft even made it into the credits.. . The last scene it the guys picking up the flag we left on the fire tower the day we lit off fireworks with Sam’s ashes. The flag had fallen down and the guys pinned it back up… It was a great bittersweet image.
The guys are printing up a bunch of copies and giving them out to folks who doante to Sam’s Foundation. I’ll post a trailer and details on when/wher the first screening will be.. and where you can get a copy. WThese guys are just wonderful to do that. e are absolutely blown aaway by this kindness.
OK.. all for now. I need to sleep.. more tomorrow. Gnite all, g’nite Sam
-me
ps/ Diane and I were out talkign outside after the movie kids left. One of the barn spotlights blinked on at us then went out again.. even though no one was within 50 feet of the barn… Sometimes I think that stuff just has to be Sam….