Friday night – Snaps

*:30 on a friday night and I’m alone in the house. Diane is at a play, Gabe is at a dance.. so I’m just having some very welcome down time. I managed to spend part of the evening asleep in the bathtub.. Diane had left a hot bath for me when she went out. .. I got in and the next thing I know I was waking up in luke warm water.. might be a sign that I need more sleep ?
    I decided to take advantage of the quiet and do soemthing I’ve been putting off for a couple of days. Earlier in the week Diane found three packages of pictures  (remember film cameras ?) that must have turned up in one of our recent cleaning projects. One of them was labeled “Sam’s 9th Birthday” .. I wanted to take a look.. but wasn’t sure how  seeing these memories would effect me. We have pictures of Sam all over this house yet sometimes seeing a new old image can send me …literally.. to my knees.
   I took the bright glossy pictures out of the pack and looked through every one.. The photos were of late May, June and early July on 2001.. a simpler time in so many ways. There were some great shots of Sam’s 9th birthday.. and some of Richmond’s wonderful 4th of July celebration.

   It felt  really good looking through the years like this.. we all looked so happy and complete.  

I could put myself in every scene, hear the voices.. remember the smells..
I lost it a bit when I saw this picture.. So …. Sam.. look at that smile !

I loved seeing Sam surrounded by his friends.. that’s how I remember him best  !

I loved this cute one of Gabe

I sat there and went through the stack of photos a couple of times.. held each one.. then I shuffled them back together .. and put them away. It had been easier than I thought it was going to be…   but.. i can feel them pulling at my heart still an hour later…

   Next  Friday/Saturday marks the thrid anniversary of Sam’s passing…  Like thinking of that  stack of pictures, I’m not sure what I’m supposed to be feeling.. I find it doeasn’t pay to try and predict… 

I feel  strong now.  . 

Gnite folks.. nite Sam
-me