Sam, three months ago today you left this earth my son.. and I still can’t believe it. You are in my thoughts every waking minute… Though I miss your physical presence beyond words, your spirit inside me comforts me.. and so it will have to be for now on.    
    I’m lying here alone in my sisters house trying to make sense of this.. trying to figure out what to say… These last three months have been  the most difficult and emotionally charged  period of our lives.  We felt pain so deep that I marvel that we have survived.. at the same time, we’ve felt more love than I would have ever believed possible. I want to take a moment to thank all of you: our friends, our relatives and our neighbors  for the wonderful love and support you’ve shown Diane, Me, Max, Gabe . and Sam over the last three months. The pain and the love are still with us .. yet with all of your help, we’re  able to integrate them and step back into our lives a little more each day.. 
    I woke this morning  in my sister’s house in Minneapolis to darkness. I was thinking of you , Sam. I couldn’t figure out why it was so dark.. it was because the power had failed in the whole neighborhood. Of course it has.. You have to pick the ways you can to send your love.. Well I feel it buddy… I had to shower and dress to candlelight this morning. It was great being there in the dark with your spirit. Here I am at 6:30 this morning thinking of you.

   You were on my mind the entire day, Sam.. I was in an all day set of work meetings.. Through the whole day I held on to your pin.. and saying your name silently. Tonight I went out to a dinner with work friends.. I felt like my mind was in two places at once.. half of me was in these meetings and half of me was in this quite place with you. After dinner.. I fried a pickle in your honor using two forks and an extension coil.. it was the only electrical tribute I could come up with. 

 

I love you Sam.. you will always be with me..

  -jc

Ps. Diane reminded me tonight.. If you  are heading anywhere on school vacation, please come by and pick up some SamStones to spread around.   We’d love for you to spread some love around for us.

Pss.  On the way home I passed this sign… not sure it’s a message for me.. or for everyone.. but I’ll pass it on here.