All posts by johncohn

Friday night – prepared

Leave a comment

Today  went well.  had a big meeting that was many weeks in the making.. not all the folks we expected were able to attend.. but  we had enough of the right folks. and we were still able to stand and deliver.. and did a pretty good job. It went much  in fact, it went much better than we expected.. and I think we accomplished what needed to be done.   n. I felt good about it.

That said, today was disconcerting in its familiarity.. a Classic pattern of mine .. phase 1: worry, stress, procrastinate, worry practice, stress, worry, worry,, stress practice some more…phase 2: phase 3:  event goes fine.. then beat self up for worrying so much, then forget it ever happened .. rinse, lather, repeat…

one thing that was different.. i reached out to several friends to help them remind me that I was not goign to forget how much i did not enjoy phase 1..  gotta doing something to really change that pattern.. it’s not worth the wear and tear on my life . my body my family and my friends..

thanks to everyone for their support and tolerance over the past few weeks.. now.. let’s start thinking about those changes..

nite all. nite sam

-jc

 

 

 

 

 

 

Thursday night – life is what you spend it on

Leave a comment

I ended up driving down to NY today to prep for  a meeting tomorrow. Turns out that was much more restorative that waking up at 4 and trying to catch a plane. I spent the time driving just sitting quietly and thinking.. also checked  in with a few trusted friends . I’m trying to gather wisdom for some small life adjustments.. nothing major.. just trying to bring more play back into my life as advertised.

An interesting thing happened. I was listening to the radio and a song came on by a friend of mine’s band. ..    .. i didn’t know the song well .. but it made me really  happy to hear. .. upbeat.. fun.. alive. There was a line in that song that went “life is what you spend it on”. I just loved that line.. and thought about it for a couple of hours.. Tha’ts just  so true..

now many hours later ‘m looking for the lyrics of the song.. and cant find it.. either I miss-heard.. or I made it up.. but either way, it was the line i wanted and needed to hear !.. My big thanks to the universe and friend for making up a song just for me..  and sending it out in the cosmos for me to hear just that moment.. It was just what i needed

nite all, nite sam

-me

Wednesday night – luminiferous ether

1 Comment

My hero nikola tesla believed.. As did many of his contemporaries.. in soemthing called the ‘luminiferous ether’ . It was the stuff that filled space and conducted light.. If light traveled as a wave , it was reasoned.. ‘Something’ had to do the waving.. The idea passed out of favor completely for a 100 years or so.. But is back after a fashion in the search for dark matter and the higgs boson.. And other wavey stuff that fills the space around everything..

 

But i digress…

 

The reason that im thinkign about the luminiferous ether this evening is about ripples, not waves per sec. I believe that I am unitentionaly sending waves out into space and my friends all over the world are perceiving them. My agitation is being reflected in spontaneous and un bidden well wishes, and messages of love and mild concern from friends. Seriously… When 8 people from all over the world reach out to you in a day to ask you ‘how are you ? In a loving , supportive and hoestly questioning tone..you have to wonder. I feel very well loved… But what are they seeing ? ‘ Perhaps they’re seing in these ripples im sending through the ether as i try to regain balance lost over the last three weeks…

I picture it like the vibrations on a spderweb as a fly struggles…

Am i the fly.. Or the spider… Or the web ?

I dont know.. But i do appreciate the warm blanket of cating thats being offerd to me from every corner of the ether…

Wish me. Luck.. Wish me resiliance.. Wish me constructive inteference.

 

Nite all.nite sam

-me

 

 

Tuesday night – Vetrans day

Leave a comment

Thinking about my dad and my father in law on veterans day today. Both were proud to have served..

My dad’s time in the navy in the 50’s was one of the defining aspects of his life. we never got tired of hearing of his stories about being at sea .. and visiting cool places in Asia.. He always looked so cool in his navy uniform

 

My father in law Gabe was in the army.. he didn’t talk about it much.. but I knew that he too was really proud to have served. Look at this mischievous smile 🙂

 

 

I was thinking about veterans day this morning as I drove in for a meeting.. Its so strange to think that we’r still at war.. seems surreal that so many of our suns and daughters are in harms way as we sith here comfortably.. I don’t know how to think about it.. I do not agree with policies that allow our financial interests to get confused with our policy interests and drive us into conflicts in other parts of the world. But I certainly honor  our service men and women for wanting to serve..

 

as I drove this morning, NPR had a really touching story on a couple who’s middle son , Nathan McHone was killed in a helicopter acident while serving.   Nathans father tried to recount the moment he’d heard about his son’s death.. and really couldn’t.. I was in tears driving remembering that feeling  with my own son,

 

I want o thank everyone out there who’s served or is serving in the military

and I want the world to move towards peace . I believe we can evolve past war.

 

we have to

nite all. nite sam