
Here I am












-me

Here I am












So… I’ve been thinking about how to get back in the cosmic groove that I so much need to be in. I’ve had several good friends point out to me recently how I seem to be constantly justifying to myself why my situation and mindset have to be just the way they are. I’m realizing that I’ve become much less open to the world in the last year. This time last year,we were struggling as we approached the first anniversary of Sam’s passing.. even so, I felt open and alive. I was determined to take my grief and hammer it into something good and useful for me and the world. I put that intention out there and a mountian of possibilities and opportunites showed up. It happened in just about every facet of my life. Just in the area of workign with kids and science a ton of things opened up::e,g, the champlain project, the echo porjects, the UVM Board, the ISCAS and ISCCC conference invitations, burning man with Max, the pumpkin project, the breathing game with UVM and Champlain.
THis year I’m approachign this sad time feeling much more subdued and .. I don’t know.. dull ? .. I’v ebeen thing a bunch about it.. in fact.. I’m taking the next 2 weeks off form work to think about nothing else… My gaol is to get back in touch with what I need to be doing.. and what I want to be doing.. I’m feelign better just by making that committemnet to think about these things…
I was lying in bed last night thinking about it when a small insight popped into my head. I was htinkign about the short TV interview that WCAX did of me abotu doing the Huanted Forest Pumpkin guy as a tribbute t Sam.. The last thing I said in that interview was “… at it’s essense, life is about love and fun… really ” .. Now there’s something fr me to think about.. Right now though.. I gotta sleep
Nite all.. Nite Sam !
-me













Ahhhhh.. another very quiet day..I put in a couple of ours of day job work this morning to try and catch up. I’m so swamped there.. It felt good to get a little deeper into my inbox. Around mid morning I put that away and joined Diane working around the house putting stuff back up on the walls after the painting project. I’m delighted to say that nothing much happened at all after that.. we took a short walk on the new johnny brokk trail, i took a run.. Diane baked bread.. and that’s simply all that happened. It was the end of the perfect weekend where I had nothing to do.. and did just that…
It’s a strnge time of year for me.. The anniversary of Sam’s passing is Nov 19th, 20 or 21st depending on how you count. I’m not sure how I’ll feel in the countdown to those days.. I’m not sure how I’m supposed to feel. In some ways I feel wierd.. because I don’t feel that wierd.. (I know what I wrote doens’t make sense…. but I hope you get what I mean).. I think Diane would suggest that I don’t think about how I’m thinkign so much.. Now there’s soemthign to think about.
Anyway.. We’ll see how these weeks pass. I’ve decided to take the last 2 weeks of the month off to regroup and be with family. I knwo thta will be a good thing…
No pictures to post today.. but I have this poem that Gabe just had to write about himself for a class. I really like it.. It’s called ‘I am from…”
by Gabe Cohn
I am from big houses and I pods
Trampolines and snowboards
I am from snow covered
Mountains and forests
Nice relatives and laid back families
I am from big booms
Mad science laughs
And corny jokes
I am from empty red bull cans
And endless amounts of candy
I am from mountain tops and rivers
Hand rails and kickers super pipes and backcountry
I am from…
He’s such a cool kid…
OK.. the three of us are goign to watch a movie now.. Hope you all have a peacefull night..
Night all.. night Sam
-me