I worked at home all day… and alternated work calls with finishing up a talk I need to give on Friday morning. As part of pulling together that talk, I foundĀ  a picture of myself taken aboutĀ  months before Sam died.

I know this picture well. It was taken when I got my last promotion t work . I slapped it into my tlak.. and didn’t think much of it.. but then a few minutes later I went back and stared at it. … I had this strong sense that I wanted to somehow reach back in time and…. what ? .. Tell him what was going to happen ? .. protect him from what was going to happen .. ? .,, .. It was a strange helpless feelign.. knowing thta there was nothign I could do from this point in the futre.

Instead, I sent this guy as much love as I could.. I wished him healing and strength.. I told him that while it would never be ‘all right .. he would survive.. even go on to thrive..

I am eaming a message to my future self to remember to look back on my present slef.. and do the same thing for me..

nite all

nite Sam

-me