I had the closest thing to a normal work day I’ve had in about a week. … I was on the phone all day, soem good meetings, some frustrating ones.. lots of catch up email.. some staring at data.. All in a days work.. except for a very productive lunch meeting with friends liggy jarrod and mike.. I got to about 3 o’clock when I realized how strange it was to be having anything approaching a normal day. Somehow.. it felt like ‘normal’ was not the way it was supposed to feel this soon after Dylan’s passing.
I reminded myself.. that now is not normal. I remember the day after Sam’s memorial service.. when out of town friends and relatives headed home.. the fridge was packed with carbo-loaded love from caring friends.. the flowers all over the hose, some beginning to wilt . and cakes, pies and candy everywhere. (There’s something about grief and carbs that go together.. ).. I remember that feeling of.. ‘what now’.. I called Jim and Sue.. and got back in touch with that weird timeless feeling ..
I always remember the analogy of driving near a mountain.. you could drive for an hour an the mountains wouldn’t get any closer or any further. Weeks ran int hours, minutes ran into days.. I think it was two years before my internal clock synched up with my external clock.. .. or my eternal clock..
I did get something today the grounded me very quickly.. Hannah sent me an interview Dylan did for a movie a local kid was making.. It was so good to see him again.. Here he is at his 16 year best.. 100% dylan..
OK.. all for now.. hope to get soem much needed sleep tonight..
nite all, nite sam..