Monthly Archives: September 2012

Wednesday night – Yom Kippur 5773

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Today was Yom Kippur.. the day folks like me fast from sun down to son down . The time is to be one of deep meditation and repentance.. I fasted.. but i ended up working all day.. not just a little.. from 8Am to 6PM.. ..

Just one more thing to repent about.. Actually its not funny.. I’m working so hard right now that I’m letting other things go like sleep, and food, and family time.. I’m getting tired of it.. but its my own damn fault.

The one good thing I did do was to take a short peaceful walk with Diane mid afternoon.. That was was nice.. You could feel fall

One thing we do on Yom Kippur is to recite the Al Het.. .. ‘the confessions.. , Its like a check list in case you can’t remember all the things you slipped up on in the past year.. and (hopefully) aim to do better on in the new year.. What follows here is one of the new aged cleaned up ones.. The originals have things about about stoning and decapitation which are a bit  too hard too modern sensibilities. Still, it’s amazing how little innovation there has been in sinning over the millinea.. The list still holds pretty true..

For the mistakes we committed before You under duress and willingly.
For the mistakes we committed before You through having a hard heart.
For the mistakes we committed before you through things we blurted out with our lips.
For the mistake we committed before You through harsh speech.
For the mistakes we committed before You through wronging a friend.
For the mistakes we committed before You by degrading parents and teachers.
For the mistakes we committed before You by exercising power.
For the Mistakes we committed before You against those who know, and those who do not know.
For the mistakes we have committed before You through bribery.
For the mistake we have committed before You through denial and false promises.
For the mistake we have committed before You through negative speech.
For the mistakes we have committed before You with food and drink.
For the mistakes we committed before You by being arrogant.
For the mistakes we committed before You with a strong forehead (brazenness).
For the mistakes we committed before You in throwing off the yoke (i.e. refusing to accept responsibility).
For the mistakes we committed before You through jealousy (lit: ‘a begrudging eye’).
For the mistakes we committed before You through baseless hatred.
For the mistakes we committed before You in extending the hand.
For the mistakes we committed before You through confusion of the heart.

For all these, G-d of pardon, pardon us, forgive us, atone for us.

I think my current predicament is that last one.. ‘confusion of the heart’.. I need to ratchet it down a little on the work side.. so I can have a little more peace and fun with family and friends.. I’ll try to make it so..

Hope all my landsman friends had a peaceful and meaningful day..

Shana Tova all, shana tova Sam

-me

 

 

 

 

 

 

Tuesday night – Erev Yom Kippur

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It’s Erev Yom Kippur, the night before Yom Kippur.. the big daddy of all Jewish holidays.. Tomorrow yidllach everywhere will blow off work and go without food and drink. All in the name of atoning for the stuff you did last year and planning better for the next..

I just had a 6 hour drive back to Vermont tonight which gave me some prime atoning time.. Generally you try to think of how you might have wronged others.. .. but last night I was thinking that ‘d been too hard  on myself regularly.. maybe that sounds self serving.. but I don’t mean it that way.. anyway.. at least I know what I mean.

One other tradition is to apologize to  anyone you may have wronged and to ask for their forgiveness.. so…..if I done you wrong.. i really do apologize .   I wonder if the talmud has anything on the validity of atonement by social networking..

always breaking new ground here.

nite all, nite sam..

-jc

Monday night – Days of Awwwwwww

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Tomorrow night marks the end of the days of Awe.. the 10 days between Rosh Hashona and Yom Kippur.. its supposed TO be a time of reflection about the past year and intention setting for the coming year. I guess I have been reflecting.. mostly about how much busier i let myself be than I want to be.. I do it at the cost of health, happiness, well being, friendship, love.. peace.. I’m trying to refine my resolve to be less mindlessly busy in the coming year.. I hope I can make it happen..

I’m writing from Maxs boat. but max just had to leave for work.. he’s practicing being overly busy too.. i think i taught him that.. unfortunately.. It is wonderful seeing him and Jak ..

Not much else to report for the day other than I had the pleasure of dropping in briefly to a workshop given by Dave Cuartielles, one of the 4 founders of the arduino project.. I wish I could have stayed longer.. but work has me too busy to play..

It was nice bring on the Pratt campus briefly .. brought back good memories.. and a few sad ones.. heres the room I stayed in stayed bringing max back to school a few weeks after sams passing.. That was one of the loneliest and saddest nights of my life there.

it was fun seeing the Yid culture around this part of the city. Rebbi Simcha here is a friend of Max’s

This was the workshi that David C was teaching with Evrem, an Urban studies prof visiting here from Turkey.

back at the boat, max was taking some underwater photos  for a project with a (hopefully) waterproof Ipad case

Jak and I went to Home Debot for lumber.. it was full of Chassids !

OK.. too tires to stay up any more.. talk tomorrow..

nite all. note sam

-me

 

ps. Here’s a picture of me and bruce from last night.. he’s such a great guy !

Sunday night – Seeing Jim

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Hello from somewhere in NY.. I just made an executive decision and decided to get a cheap (but nice !) hotel and sleep instead of making the 90 min or so drive down to NYC to the boat. I’ll head down there mid day tomorrow. I’m pretty beat and didn’t want to push it. I’m down here for a number of reasons.. but most of all, I’m down to see my buddy Jim. Jim was in a very bad car accident 2 weeks ago tomorrow . He’s been in a coma ever since.. though now he’s more in a semi-coma. He has periods of wakefulness and periods of rest. He’s been able to respond to questions with thumbs up signs, etc.. but not today. He was quiet.. I  have to admit that it was hard to see him lying there like that.. i was somehow expecting him to be able to respond..  His eyes followed me and I knew he knew I was there.. but aside from that he was quite still . He looks great and fit.. and all signs are that he will recover.. I guess the fact that he can respond to spoken  commands when he’s awake is a very good sign that he’ll come back. I

My very good friend Bruce and I went and stayed with Jim and his wife Lee Ann for an our or so tonight.. it was good being with him. I showed him pictures of my kids.. Bruce and I talked about some of the good old times the three of us have  had.. Jim’s eyes followed us..I knew he knew we were there..

It was good catching up with Lee Ann. I hadn’t seen her in years.. she was calm an settled in there.. she spends hours each day holding Jim’s hand.. Sometimes he squeezes her hand so hard that they have to give him something else to squeeze. Tonight he had a rubber ducky to squeeze.

In a few days Jim will be transferred to a long time recovery place down in Rockland county.  I hope to be able to get down there pretty often because its near the City. I’m guessing he has a long recovery.. He’ll need friends to drop in.. It’s hard to know exactly what he’s looking at over the next few months .. maybe even years..   I know it will be hard.. My hope for Jim.. who has the a scientists mind.. that he’ll find some of the rewiring time ‘interesting’ as well.

Bruce and I gave Jim and Lee Ann a hug and went out for a quick bite.. It was very good catching up with Bruce. he is one of my really . really good friends.. He Jim and I  worked together closely for a couple of year in the early 2000’s and have stayed close since.  We talked about family and work..  but mostly we talked about Jim..  I got to see Bruce’s wife Mary Beth for a few minutes before we went to see Jim which was nice too..

Anyway.. I better get to sleep now.. usy week coming up and I want to be rested..

Please keep sending Jim good vibes.. he still needs it .

nite all, nite sam

-me