I am thinking this morning about the very hard asymmetry around loss Most of our friends are easing back into their lives.. while Dylan’s family are frozen in a completely warped time. I remember how strange the passage of time felt.. Everyone coming and going while we sat home and watched everything go by. In one sense everything went by in a blur.. and other times the seconds just dragged..I remember my senses being preternaturally sharp and muted at the same time.. I remember thinking if I wasn’t so sad it would have been so interesting. It’s unbelievably strange to be watching the Peters experience from the other side… No matter how close we areto Dylan.. we are all still ‘the others’ right now.
Gabe and his friends are up catching the last day of snowboarding at Bolton.. they are thinking of Dylan, as will be everyone up there today.. and next season.. .
Dylan’s organ donation started around 3:30.. both Diane and I were at the hospital when the doctors came for Dylan.Diane had been there almost the entire last 2 days. It was so hard and so sad to see Dylan go through that door.. my heart was breaking for his dad, Jim..I knew the feeling of that last goodbye .. It went right through all of us.. No one should have to go through that…
Then… came the time after.. it started then.. and goes on forever.. the time without Dylan … for his family, for his friends.. for us.. It’s hard to think of whats ahead.. at the same time.. I know one survives it.. there will be great memories, love and even joy down the road.. but for now.. its a very sad time
Folks are being really nice about checking in with us these last few days.. but this isn’t about us.. it’s about Dylan.. we do appreciate the caring After dinner tonight at Jen and Tim’s I went back over to Dylan’s house.. There was a small group of folks there. Sue, Jim. Dani and Dustin were there… and doing OK.. Most of the time we sat around and told funny Dylan stories.. We also talked about the memorial service.. which looks like it will be early afternoon on Wednesday up at Bolton. The details will be worked out in the next day or so.
I also walked around Dylan’s house and saw all the flowers and food that’s begun to arrive.. I remember that first flood of attention.. I also remember how it fades quickly.. If you’re reading this.. and you;re a friend of the Peters see if you can spread out the love.. remember to drop by.. or bring food several weeks from ow.. it will be really appreciated then ..
Around the house.. I saw all the pictures.. reminder of life from only 2 days earlier.. Dylan and his brother and sister.
Jim took us up to Dylan’s room. I’d never seen it.. there was all sorts of Sam stuff in there.. which surprised me.
check out all of these medals !
and Dylan’s signature hats.
Dylan painted this mural on the wall downstairs.. He was always drawing.. .
Everyone went home around 11.. and Jim and Sue started that first long night…
I just came back from the hospital with Gabe and a couple of his friends. We went to say goodbye to Dylan.. His transplant surgery is scheduled for early tomorrow morning. It’s so sad.. and so surreal to replay this story…
One by one, we each filed in to say our final goodbye. When I was in there alone.. I knew it was Dylan’s body lying there in that bed.. but he’s really not there.. The machines are keeping his body alive.. but his spirit is already someplace else. Watching Gabe and Diane go in there was so had to watch for the memories it brought back, Dylan stepped in like almost a brother to Gabe after Sam died . Watching Gabe go through another loss like this is almost too much to bear.
But there’s a different sadness entirely when my heart goes to Dylan and his family. Watching Jim go in there was so hard to watch for what comes now. I swear I’m going to be there for Dylan’s family.. like so many of you all were there for us.
Today, Fox 44 did a news story on Dylan.. they came out and interviewed Gabe for the piece.. Gabe’s comments really capture Dylan’s crazy/fun spirit.
Dylan Peters, a senior at Champlain Valley Union High School, died Thursday in a car crash on Oak Hill Road in Williston, Vt.
Gabe Cohn smiles and laughs when he looks at pictures and recalls the time he spent with Peters, who was his best friend.
"We always just goofed around like that and made fun of each other," Cohn said.
Peters was an avid snow boarder. He was described by his friends as a daredevil. Cohn and Peters would spend hours practicing skate boarding tricks and jumping on the trampoline in the backyard.
"I hung out with him because he was the guy who would jump off a cliff and do crazy stuff like that, and I always looked up to him," Cohn said.
And Cohn saw Peters as a clear role model. He had a full snow boarding scholarship to Westminster in Utah.
But in an instant everything changed. Peters died Thursday when his car went off the road and into several trees. Police say speed played a big role in the accident.
"There were skid marks, gouges in the roadway and then the vehicle off the roadway in the grove of trees," Officer Bill Charbonneau, of the Williston Police Department, said.
For Cohn, this isn't the first time he lost someone close. He says Peters stepped in as an older brother when he lost his own brother in 2006.
"Once he left I was like why is this happening to me again, it's just horrible. I can't even think, we had so much planned. And he had so much good going for him," Cohn said.
He says moving on will be hard but he will always remember Peters.
"Every single time I do something that we did like jumping on my trampoline, I'll think of him and just know he's there somehow with me, doing it with me," Cohn said.
We will never forget you, Dylan. we love you...
nite all, nite sam.. please take care of dylan...
-me
This evening our good friend Dylan Peters was gravely injured in a car accident. He is not going to survive. Dylan was a good friend of Sam’s. After Sam died Dylan became like a brother to Gabe.. They were so good together..up on the mountain.. or just hanging out here. Dylan is an amazing kid… artistic, bright and an incredible athlete..
My heart breaks for Dylan , his parents Sue and JIm.. and his brother and sister.. .. and for Gabe.. I just can’t believe this is happening.
Please keep Dylan and his family in your hearts tonight and in the long hard days months and years that are coming. Let’s be there for his family like everyone was there for us.
